I suppose the lesson of this weekend is that nothing comes easy. With highs, come lows, and this week was a pretty tough one for me, and I am now trying to recover from it. I am definitely at a place I haven't been before and I suppose I will be getting new lessons from it, as is always the case. The week started out with two midterms on monday, both of which I shit the bed, I even got my mark back for one of them on wednesday and I failed it! So depressing, I don't know why but during both of them I froze up and couldn't think through the problems. I didn't prepare properly either but there was no way I should have done so poorly by any means. I have put a lot of pressure on myself to do well in school so this was really disheartening, which set me up for this race on the weekend with the mindset that I have to at least do well in running. When things did not feel great in the race when I picked it up to a decent pace at about 7k I struggled until 10miles in 52:21, then ran the next mile in 5:36, completely out of fight and quit. What was going through my brain, was that I was doing poorly at the two pursuits I am putting most of my energy into so I just didn't have the mental fight in me, I was defeated.
This is really a new place for me also because I am so busy and have a level of mental stress I am not used to, and I suppose it is making it harder for me to recover and be fresh and ready to race, maybe I need to adjust my expectations. Right now, I am not entirely sure what I need to do. For starters I need to keep plugging away and ride this low point out, also I am going to start forcing more of a routine so that my life is a bit more predictable and consistent, so my body isn't confused as to what it is going to do each day. When you are busy, routine and consistency are definitely keys to success. Basically I need to be proactive and adjust accordingly, life won't get any less busy.
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